i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
