I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
