dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
