can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize