I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Please, let me fuck your mom
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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