don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
