We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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