just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize