Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
