i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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