she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
