Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
