i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
