You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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