have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
