taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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