You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize