its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
