New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
