is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
