like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
