i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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