from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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