hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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