DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize
