Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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