you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
