Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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