my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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