And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
