my vag is so smooth its legendary
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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