Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
