I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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