is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
