exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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