If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
