sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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