I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Operation Purity has been aborted
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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