They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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