my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I love having hate sex.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
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