no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
