For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
