he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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