I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
