so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
