Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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