Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
