Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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