Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I see more hoeing in ur future
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
