Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
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